Arg

[jeanvieve]

I've been burdened with information that I didn't want, which makes me think much less of someone in so many ways. One of those times when every aspect of a confession makes one bristle with censure. So much more than "What were you thinking", far into the "Why are you wasting your money to get there when you're broke and borrowing" and then deeply into the "Sure, another person was involved, but you're the one who did it".

So here it is, my really bitchy self:

You, yes you all as individuals in the world are responsible for every single thing you do regardless of your current mental competency and state, with only the exceptions of the truly psychotic (in which case should not be roving free) and the drugged not by choice (rohypnol, eg).

If you drive drunk and kill someone, that's manslaughter.

If you drink and cheat, you're a cheater. It's not the other person taking advantage of you being drunk. It's you.

I have no sympathy for things that happened to you while you were drunk. You are not an effing victim, save by yourself. You went into public and drank.

If you want to be a drunk, do it at home in the privacy of your own home so that you minimize the possibility you'll hurt others.

That is all. Fuck. Lost all respect.

Comments

[snobahr.livejournal.com]

I tend not to drink in public places, generally because I'm usually the Designated Driver. When I do drink, it's either at my home, or the home of friends who I trust. We try not to be stupid, however silly we might get while intoxicated.

[answers-within.livejournal.com]

I am SO GLAD I am not the only one who believes this and will say it publicly. I mean, I know in a broader sense that I'm not the only one, but I'm still appalled and really depressed by the number of people who think that drunkenness is the ultimate "out" for anything they do. Like you, I don't really accept any excuses for unacceptable behavior except genuine medical ones, and those are vanishingly rare.

If you fuck up, YOU FUCKED UP. Nobody made you do it, and for sure nobody else can be blamed for it. If you can't control your behavior when you drink, it is incumbent upon you as an (ostensibly) adult human being to NOT DRINK. I don't care who else did what as an accomplice - that's their own issue and their own fault and they have to work it out with themselves and whoever else they hurt. Nothing they do or don't do absolves you of anything.

I'm not a teetotaller but I grew out of thinking "drunk culture" was fun when I was in my early 20's. Now I find it annoying at best and entirely disgusting and train-wreck-y at worst, so I usually give it a pass.

Also, I totally get the pain of "now I know it and I can't un-know it". Sounds like in this case maybe it was important that you know it, since this person clearly violated your ethical boundaries and that's something you don't want sneaking up behind you, but it's painful nonetheless. I'm sorry all the way around.

*HUG*

[im-geva.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry for you, Jeanie.

I hate learning things about my friends I didn't ever want to know. Especially when it causes the loss of respect.

[jeanvieve.livejournal.com]

Yeah. But hopefully it will lead to better things between the two parties involved. Things like re-establishing rules and boundaries.

Cause as fate would have it, the other interested party is willing to forgive things I'd dump someone for. And you can't tell someone else what to feel or do.

I'm definitely pulling out of this one. It's just going to make it harder to do things for the offender in the future on their own behalf if asked.